I said, "What if they say they’re gay?" He was gay, by the way.
He said, "Oh, in that case, we just talk about whatever they came to me for.""
Amy Andre in “Nothing About Us Without Us” from her speech on problems of Physical Health in the Bisexual Community, at a bisexual roundtable on 23 September 2013 in Washington DC USA (via bialogue-group)
It’s this shit right here that gets me so fucking mad at people who trivialise biphobia and monosexism by saying shit like “oh the worst you get is people thinking you are confused and greedy”, as if those stereotypes has no real consequences for bisexuals.
This is a fucking therapist, a man in charge of helping people overcome mental health issues and trauma, admitting freely that he and his colleagues treat bisexuality as if it is a mental health problem and a symptom of mental disturbance to be treated and cured.
He is telling a bi woman that he does treat gay people the same way and I’m pretty sure that he doesn’t treat straight folks that way, he is singling out bisexuals because he thinks there is something wrong with us identifying that way, because we are, in his mind, confused.
It makes me sick to think that he is making clients doubt and dissect their own sexuality, blamed their bisexuality for their mental state, told them that bisexuality was a symptom or something to take centre-stage over everything because he thinks it’s not as natural or mentally healthy as monosexuality.
This attitude towards bisexuality is endemic to the medical health industry, especially mental health, which is already a problematic field given how much stigma is attached to mental illness.
So many times I hear bisexuals express their anger at being told by qualified therapists and doctors that they were confused, greedy and/or unstable and therefore had to jump through pointless hoops, longer and more invasive therapy sessions, or even worse, threatened with having treatment withheld or taken in a direction completely different from monosexuals because “it’s all in their heads” or “just doing it for attention”. All because the person in charge takes Freud a little too seriously and/or believes all the shitty stereotypes that seem ever so trivial and not worth combatting to biphobia-deniers.
And people wonder why bisexuals don’t come out to health professionals? They wonder why we don’t come out at all? They wonder why bisexuals have a rate of suicide and poor health way above straight and gay people?
Don’t ever tell me that is trivial. Bisexuals die because of these stereotypes, they are killed by these so-called mental health professionals telling them that they need to be cured by denying themselves and are erased after death by monosexism. Fuck everyone who doesn’t think that’s worth caring about.
Sometimes recovery is waking up early to write in coffee shops and practicing yoga and eating lots of fruit and chocolate and sometimes it’s staying in bed all day and hiding from the world until you can stop crying. All of this is okay. What’s important is that you take care of yourself no matter what kind of day you’re having.
Dear Sir Michael Parkinson and Channel 10,
After seeing your ads for your interview with Ian Thorpe, I have come to believe that questions about someone’s sexuality are incredibly relevant and are more newsworthy than the systematic destruction of Palestine by Israel.
I write to you to claim the $400,000 my non-heterosexual sexuality is worth, in return for a “No question off limits” interview, just like Thorpie did.
In this interview, I will give you such perfect shots as the “feeling uncomfortable about my sexuality” shot. I have been practicing since I first started to understand that I wasn’t just attracted to girls, but boys as well. This has now been well over 7 years, and one could say I am an expert.
In this interview, I will accept less-than-satisfactory understandings of sexuality and allow you to perpetuate them such as using the term ‘gay’ instead of ‘queer’ or ‘bisexual’ that I may in fact prefer.
In this interview, I will allow an older, straight white male to ask ignorantly about my status of mental health, trips to rehabs and institutions for rehabilitation and even allow you to pretend that this isn’t common amongst those who are queer or trans*gender.
In this interview, I will allow Channel 10 to credit they were the ones who ‘caught me out’ and made me ‘spill the beans’ and ‘prove’ you were onto me the entire time regarding my love of dick.
Wasn’t it all just so obvious. Apparently.
I can provide all of this and more to your fine media establishment so that you can tick boxes of diversity and credibility in providing Australia with hard hitting facts and truths. I will allow you to pander my life and personal decisions across the screen for hours, and potentially even suggest a revisit interview after 6 weeks or so of being public with my newly found sexuality.
Perhaps we can even make a joke about my gender, and how it’s apparently intertwined with my sexual and romantic practices and interests.
I look forward to hear from you soon for a date and time.
'email@example.com' for further comment.